Oh So Boring…

You know you need to turn in your man card when you view a Flickr set of a bunch of Leias-in-slave-costume and spend your time actually critiquing and analyzing and zooming in on the costumes. Stuff like, “who has the most authentic-looking costume” and such.

Yes, I have seen Return often enough that I’m a semi-good judge of that. No, you were the frustrated nerd in school.

Yep, lost points on the ol’ man card with this. Deeeeeeeefinitely didn’t lose my nerd card, though. That sucker got upgraded to “nerd guy on Robot Chicken” level.

Yours in jedi,

Matt

No, it’s not a new The Big Bang Theory episode title (though it’d be a cool one…it’s all yours, Mr Lorre).  Rather it’s an odd axiom that popped into my head in the shower (calm yourselves, ladies) having to do with the rate of use of shampoo v. conditioner.

Damn, I am a NERD!

But, back to the Inequality. A while back, I bought a matching set of shampoo and conditioner (citrus-lime). They were by the same manufacturer and came in the same size bottle.  Thus, they contained the same volume. But now in present day, I find that I have an empty bottle of shampoo, and an, oh, half-full conditioner bottle.

And I’m betting that would happen in every shower. Regardless of the showerees.

Why? Well, when I wash my hair, I always use, let’s say, x amount of shampoo. Sometimes, 2x, because, I “rinse and repeat” if the hair needs it. If I use conditioner, I’d use the same amount x of conditioner. But I’ve never repeated the conditioner, and sometimes, I just don’t use it at all.

So, I’m using, say, 1.5x of shampoo and 0.75x of conditioner. Thus:

shampoo used >= conditioner used

no matter what, in my shower. Thus, the Shampoo-Conditioner Inequality. Quod erat faciendum.

Huh.

You can’t get more nerdy than this post.

But I’m gonna try, baby.

Yours in math nerd,

Matt

Ah…cryptic title…the blog’s friend.

What do I mean by “the marathon in my sleep”?  Well, that is how I’m describing what I did while I was sleeping last night.  Because somehow I managed to tweak the crap out of my back last night.

In my sleep.

I really should have studied kinesiology or anatomy or osteopathy or something in college, just so I could know how I did this while sleeping. (Any med students, doctors, PAs, or nurses out there want to tell me what field of study “straining your frakking back sleeping” would fall under?)

But since that is a gap in my knowledge, I choose to believe I ran a marathon. Or I did 100 crunches. Yeah. Sounds reasonable.

Shut up.

My body knows not to waste valuable time just lying motionless. You gotta move, baby!

Now to look like a zombie or Quasimodo and shamble over to the bathroom for a nice, long, hot shower (I’ll have the cleanest upper-right back in THE WORLD) and a generic naproxen.

Yours in hunchback,

Matt

PS: I always did, and perhaps still do, think DOs were, in some way, cooler than MDs. Same study path, but the DOs have that extra, cool bone manipulation curriculum. And, well, Jane Smith, DO, just looks a bit different and cool.